When it comes to sports, academics, dating or even colleges, parents often try to live their past experiences through their children.
Whether it’s remembering back to their childhood or wanting to change aspects of it, most of our parents are guilty as charged. As a kid it’s the best feeling to please your parents and put a smile on their face but be the worst feeling to do so by engaging in something you hate. It’s great to have our parents involved in our lives and showing that they care about any and everything we do, but whenever they force kids to do things that they don’t want to do, it’s just too much.
As a parent, one of the main goals is to put a child out in the world that resembles you and everything you stand for. A child with great morals, who is an excellent human being and is passionate in the things that they are/were into is our parents’ goal.
In sports, it tends to be the dads who are guilty of making their kids do what they did. The second that their baby boy or girl is born, daddy already sees the all-state power forward, home-run hitter, softball pitcher or Olympic gold medalist swimmer. Parents have good intentions, but sometimes take it too far when cheering their kids on. If Johnny doesn’t get the state-cut in his very first track meet, it’s not necessary to scream at the top of your lungs and ground him for 180 days.
There are parents who encourage us to do well in a healthy way, and care about us being happy rather than the outcome we get. Without parents introducing us to the sports they liked as a kid, we wouldn’t’ know if we liked them or not. In the same sense, if we don’t like them, we are often still forced to play them under the assumption that activity goes hand in hand with good physical health and development of social skills.
Dating and relationships are another area that parents wish to live vicariously through their children. Parents see themselves in us and want us to hang around the type of people they did. Therefore if they don’t like the new girl from chemistry class we brought home, that my friend is a no go. Parents play a big role in who we date and rightfully so. If I were a parent I wouldn’t want my son bringing in a girl who stands off prospect. But at the same time, parents have to give us some slack. If a kid really likes someone, a parent should see that, and recognize it, rather than forbid her from their home.
In academics, perfection equating to that big 4.0 GPA is definitely on our parents minds. Obtaining straight A’s is tough, and requires a lot of hard work, but we wouldn’t have the initiative to excel in school without our parents pushing us to achieve what was impossible for them.
Our grades are very vital to our success in the rest of high school students lives, and dictate where we get into college, which is our next point.
What college to go to, and what to major in are very tough decisions that parents are eager to help with. Parents sometimes want us to go to the college they went to, but also might want us to go somewhere else because they didn’t get to. Suggesting the Ivy league school that was once an impossible dream for them becomes the best option. Sometimes it is not about the type of education one’s child can achieve, but more about pride in attending where mom and dad are alumni. This is especially true for parents who are loyal to their graduating college sport team. Parents should help us make our decisions, but can’t make our decisions for us.
In life we would be in so much trouble without our parents. They are there for us emotionally, physically, and mentally and are a vital part of our life. I’m not saying that parents shouldn’t influence us and try to help us, I’m just saying that we are pretty smart people, so let us make our own decisions.